Nerves

We are in the final days of the IVF transfer.  No later then Saturday of next week I will have two tiny embryos placed in my tummy.  My nerves are already shot.  I am so excited and scared at the same time.  I can't believe it is almost here.

I went to the doctor yesterday for my sonogram.  I am fully ready.  My lining is better than what they were expecting it to be at this stage.  That is a good sign.  On top of that, our donor is also moving faster than expected.  They cut back on her estrogen just to keep her in line.  She looks like she will be producing about 10 eggs.  Doc said that he will give her the shot on Saturday to start the process and then she will go in for surgery (egg removal) first thing Monday morning.  Of course I don't know all of the details, but that is what I came away with.  Then it will be 3-5 days from Monday before it is my turn.  I was given a sheet of instructions from the nurse that I must keep on me at all times so I can write in the blanks - it is my final instructions for the meds.  I will be stopping some things and starting others. 

My brain is swimming lately so my memory is not very detailed and I am pretty forgetful.  And my tummy just feels funny.  With all of the hormones, the doc said I should feel like I am about to start my period - or like I am already pregnant since I am holding a lot of extra fluid.  It is a very strange feeling.

About the 10 eggs.  I was pretty disappointed with the numbers.  But everything I read stated it is better to have less good ones than it is to have many mediocre ones.  Doc said the same thing.  He said she is at the right number and they are decreasing her meds so she does not produce anymore just to be safe.  So now I am happy with the numbers and pray they are all perfect!

Today I upped my estrogen to three pills a day.  Boy let me tell you - I really do FEEL the difference.  My moods are changing more quickly but with my fuzzy memory I am pretty sure I have more of a blank look on my face than any type of other look.  Some of the girls in the office are getting a kick out of it.  I seem to ask the same question a few times within a matter of minutes.  At least I am aware of it so I can try to control it.  Maybe it is just too much on my mind and with a shorter attention span and shorter emotional span....Haha - I already forgot where I was going with this but you get the idea.  I asked the Doc and he said it is normal.

One of the blogs I read - I am going to go in and take it off my page.  Today's post was so poorly written that I cannot bare to read it any longer and really don't want to subject anyone else to it.  I write this blog for fun and also to let others know they are not alone.  I am well aware that I am the worst speller ever.  But this blog that I read is more of an informative blog - something like everything you need to know about fertility or infertility.  I expect someone who has such a blog would be educational about the subject.  Not only were some of the facts wrong in the post, but the writer wrote like they were at a grade school level - missing words, unclear sentences, wrong use of phrases.  It lost my attention in the first paragraph when I had to reread 4 of the sentences trying to understand what they were saying.